Chicagoland Gardening Columns
2004

 

 

 

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January/February

The Crash Test

Not available

 

March/April

Prune This!

Not available

 

May/June

I Can't Draw, Don't Ask Me.

Do you sing in the shower?

Um, I know that's kind of personal and you don't need to tell me what kind of soap you use but the point is, do you sing there but nowhere else? I ask only because I know that there are people out there who feel, well, incompetent at certain skills. Singing is a common one. Public speaking is another. . . .

 

July/August

Garden Wars

If ever there was dark side to an avocation based on goodness and light, it is the idea of a “gardening competition.”

Excuse me, I had to get a towel. My hands were suddenly very, very sweaty. . . .




September/October

Waiting for Gardot

“ Hey, Gerry.”
“ Morning, Al.”
“ Where's Carey?”
“ They moved him to the front this morning.”
“ No kidding. Think we're next?" . . .


 

November/December

Pathogens on Parade

Those of you who are regular readers of this column are no doubt already aware that actual horticultural content is not my strong suit. Nevertheless, gardeners are hungry for answers. Most of the time, they don't even care about the questions. For example, you can ask, "What is the capital of Albania?" and as long as the answer is "spray with a fungicide every 10 days," you have lifted 97.3 percent of all gardeners (and this number has been proven in scientific studies) into a Nirvana-like state.